The Worst Love Triangle Ever Known to Mutant
by Kirbilius Clausius
Summary: Arguably the world's least eligible bachelor manages to attract at least two the most unlikely suitors on the planet. May God have mercy on his soul.
1. Chapter 1

1

"Make a hole!", Rogue called out. "I'm late!"

In any other dormitory, a nubile Southern Belle clad in only a towel probably would not raise all that much alarm. In the X-Mansion, everyone took the warning seriously. Some with powers to simply be elsewhere used them, such as Kitty dropping through the floor or Kurt leaving only an acrid puff. Others with the ability to simply rise above the girl tried to account for others who couldn't: Jean and Scott floated to the ceiling while the stiffest of breezes caught Ororo's draping dress and Jubilation's rain coat. Maybe getting out of situations was more one's thing as Rahne managed to morph into her smaller form take cover behind one of the professor's many pedestals that lined the hallways of his manor. Barring all that, the creativity that was honed in classes came in useful as Bobby simply froze himself into a cocoon against the wall.

And then there was Jaime. The collision with Rogue's skin was all but inevitable.

"Jaime!", Rogue heard her voice echo along with two resounding face palms. She looked around and saw that not only were there a lot more Jaimes in the hall in varying states of wooziness, she could see the annoyed look on her face without aid of a mirror. With a snarl, she grabbed her doppledanger's hand and dragged it back to her room.

She slammed the door. "Arggh! I gave 'im fair warnin'.", she lamented.

And then a spark of genius struck her.

Her counterpart, wrapped in an identical towel stood just against her door somewhat patiently. Rogue rushed to her 'clone' and poker her exposed shoulder with an ungloved hand. The copy reached out and ran her hand down her own arm. "Duh.", Rogue surmised. "I don' drain myself. Or if I do, I collect the essence or whatever it is. I'm really gonna hafta start paying more attention to Dr. McCoy."

Then the line between genius and insanity became very blurry.

The copy gave her a look that mimicked her own hesitancy. Rogue's eyes flittered as she scanned her memory for everything Jaime told her about his power set. Casting off her own hesitancy may be a bit much. So instead she focused on an intent and the copy.

Her counter part slowly gathered her in her arms and gently kissed her. The uniqueness of this opportunity was two fold. Firstly, no one would come to get her no matter how late she was lest she lose what little was left of her temper with Jaime. The other was that she could finally touch someone that wouldn't be killed...or she was trying to take down. She could feel her own fingers against her any time she wished. But that simple, elusive first kiss... She showed herself some talent. Another thing the world was missing out on due to her _ability_, as the professor made her call it.

She could tell her copy agreed with her assessment. Now this was truly strange. Scott had a brain injury that kept him from controlling his optic blasts so when she had momentarily usurped his ability she could hold them back, but the world was still a shine of red. Mr. Logan's senses felt like being hopped up on what she imagined cocaine must be like, with an uncontrollable vividness that bothered her to no end. No wonder he had his disposition. But with her copy, her perception was not added to or even duplicated like she might expect. It was somehow more personal than being in her own skin.

Skin.

Her counterpart gave them both a bit of space with a pause. They allowed their towels to drop. Rogue tentatively reached out. "No.", she told her copy. "This is wrong.

"Isn't it?"

The copy gathered more courage and began to reach out. Then she simply didn't exist anymore.

This set Rogue more to cursing than actually bumping in to Jaime to begin with.

2

"I don't get it.", X-23 declared. Scott kept his gaze on the road since he was driving. Jean turned toward her from the passenger seat however. Kurt countered, "Well I get it all the time." while stretching his arms behind X-23 on one side and Kitty on the other. While Kitty giggled at the perposterousness of the statement, the glare he got from the black haired girl was enough to convince Kitty to phase into the middle seat while Kurt bamfed into existence into Kitty's previous place.

"Don't get what?", Kitty asked.

"The classes the professor had me sign up for.", X-23 replied. "New life, new rules: I get. His house, his rules: I get. But these classes aren't tracking, or martial arts, or hacking or anything of any use at all. What am I supposed to do with History?"

"Well, that depends.", Jean informed. "It could inform your perspective on how governments fail or succeed if you wanted to be a lawyer. It could tell you what answers have already been found if you want to become a scientist. It could even point you in retro directions if art's your path. It all depends on you and what you want to be."

The red head frowned. "What do you want to be?"

X-23 turned to the open window, trying to distract herself from the scents of the other people in the car. "Free."

3

"Toad, get your ass in gear!", Lance yelled toward the creek.

Todd snapped up another fly. "Why? Not like school ain't gonna be there later yo'."

Pietro appeared next to him. Wide, jaundiced eyes never saw the slap coming. "Why is because if any of the normies catches you ditching for no reason you'll get us all in trouble. So leave the bugs and get in the jeep!"

"You ain't the boss of me.", Todd attempted.

Slap.

"I wanted to go to school anyway.", the boy sulked.

Pietro disappeared only to remanifested exactly where he had been. Only now, a spray of mud had been kicked up by an attempt at a clearly impossible acceleration. The white haired teen fell face first into the mud.

Todd laughed like it was a disease with no cure. "I'm glad I'm coming now, yo. If you're gonna do this all day, I wouldn't want to miss it."

Pietro scowled, then sped off as Todd bounded toward Lance' jeep.

A feminine screech let all know who Pietro bumped into on his way to reshower. Wanda walked up to the passenger door when Todd arrived.

"It never fails to surprise me how your very presence seems to be a cool summer breeze, milady.", Todd attempted. Again.

Wanda was so tired of it that she let him know why. "That's because I alter the probability of the air currents around me to keep you down wind.

"Toad!"

And with that, she yanked the door open and got into the jeep.

A freshly showered, regroomed and redressed Pietro appeared next to Fred in the back seat. "Come on, we ain't getting any younger!", he barked.

Todd sighed. Putting on another fake, stupid smile the boy stuck himself to the back of the vehicle.

4

Jean led most of the other girls from the X-Mansion down the halls of Bayville High. The girls mostly tried to keep X-23 in their midst. Anyone that bothered to watch her for ten seconds could tell the reasoning.

One boy nodded in their direction. X-23 glared confrontationally.

Another said "hey" in passing. She snarled in return.

The next wiggled his eyebrows with a quick, "Hello Jean." The girl quickly transferred her notebook to her right arm and drew back her left, clenching her wrist.

Jean grabbed her by the wrist. "Be nice.", she said calmly.

X-23 glared at her. Then with a shrug relaxed. Jean sensed her returning to a calm...er, by her standards at least, state. They continued on as X-23 tried to ignore the mundane scents that continued to annoy her. And then she smelled him. "Who is that?, she asked aloud.

Todd slinked down the hall, hunched over avoiding the side long glances of the people who looked normal. He spotted the gaggle of girls from the X-Mansion. And they could look at him with that false pity that made them sleep better at night, the kind that's just to show oneself that they were better people because they cared even if they did not actually do anything or reach out. Or they could look at him with revulsion he himself instigated. One gave him at least some control over his fate.

Standing up straight, Todd called out. "Looking good ladies." He then hocked into his hand as only he could and dragged it back through his hair, taming it as if no other substance known to man was up to the task.

"Ew.", Jean stated abruptly. Then she sensed the one thought that stood out from the background by it's sheer uniqueness. Spinning she turned on X-23. The dark haired girl waved her fingers at Todd. "Eeeewww."

X-23 shrugged. "You said 'be nice'."

Jean was no more surprised than Todd himself was. In a half daze, he kept his eyes on the dark haired girl that somehow had more than a passing resemblance to Wolverine. He was in no condition to avoid the collision.

"Hey, Jean I was jus/", Rogue quickly ended when she was knocked down.

Todd snapped out of the spell he was in immediately. "Oh man, I'm sorry, yo. I wasn't tryin' to start nothin', yo."

He reached down and helped Rogue up. "Get off me, Toad! I mean, Todd! Gah!"

The only way to keep people from feeling as sorry for you as you are for yourself if with a cold shoulder. And Todd walked right into one.

"Sure, sure. Rogue.", Todd agreed. "I don't want any trouble."

The boy quickly slinked off.

Rogue stomped her foot in exasperation. And then she felt it. Through the one uncovered space in the back of her glove she could feel his...his...

"Is this his?", she asked the girls staring at her.

Jean slowly nodded.

"Oh my.", Rogue said and hurried to the washroom.

She bolted in and cast her gloves off. She ran water over her hands repeatedly and every single drop of the substance seemed to fight to stay on her skin. Why would he have this on his hand to begin with?

He had it on his hand.

He had touched her with his hand.

She had felt it on her skin.

And she was too busy being a cold shouldered to the world to put it together until just now. Or how he must feel about her as she had perfected the cold shoulder act. Or any one of a number of obstacles, all of her own doing.

In another twist of the knife, the realization that Todd Tolanski was going to be in class while she skipped to wallow in her own misery.


	2. Chapter 2

Lala143: Toad cannot touch Rogue. No one can touch Rogue and it would ruin some of the character's literary value if someone could. Very specific powers allow others to 'fake' it. I'm using a concept that a Neiman on came up with: Toad's ability to generate biological secretions can act as a 'super lubricant' that doesn't allow for skin contact. Just like Magneto can accenuate the electromagnetic fields that keep atoms of real matter from intersecting, therefore allow some one to come close enough and feel enough to trick them into thinking they touched him without actually touching him. It's a trick due to another character's powers, not actually touching.

As for X-23's 'acting nice', well that's what the story is about. As Gene Rodenberry once said, ~"Star Trek can never be about the ship. It has to be about people.

1

Todd was back near the creek. It was rather unique, and not just because of the dampness or even the amphibians and the insects they fed on that made it their home. Bayville, like most of the east coast, was lived in by humans for several centuries now. When there was undisturbed land, it was usually behind some rich man's fence - like the wood's surrounding Xavier's mansion. The creek was for everyone. It ran past the mansions' wooded lands, through town and even behind the boarding house. Well, a small trek behind the boarding house.

He came here because it was a rare occasion that anyone ever came to this section. There were deeper parts for the fisherman. There were other bends that passed fields for the picnicker. It was the shady, muddy section with it's buzz of nature that drew him. And that nearly everyone else found it an unpleasant place to step through.

So imagine his surprise when something very heavy fell from the tree he crouched under. It was soft like he imagined Wanda or Tabitha must be. But it was heavy, like some body had used their powers in a fight to pin him down. And it wrapped its arms around him like he should make it his immediate concern.

"No, don't be scared.", the girl that fell on (nearly into) his back instructed.

Todd had never been so bewildered in his life. "Uh, why not?"

"I'm just interested in you.", she told him. "And I asked my friends. They said to show a guy interest, you should touch him a bit.

"And for some reason, they led me over to some drama club guy. Don't know what that was about though."

"uh...huh...", he considered. "Do you mind me being scared?"

"Not if you don't jump away.", the girl draped over his back replied. "I'm told that's one of your powers and I don't know if I could keep up."

"So if I don't split, I can freak out?", Todd asked.

The girl seemed to think about this. "I didn't know we were at that point in our relationship already but/"

X23 barely landed on her feet as Todd jumped with all the might he could muster. The girl seemed to outweigh him by a multiple and that kept his leap to the trunk of a neighboring tree and then into the branches of another.

"What gives, yo?", Todd glared down at the girl. "You can't just keep it in school. You X-geeks gotta take it out on me here, too?"

"Take what out on you?", X23 asked.

"Don't act like this ain't a joke.", he countered. And that puzzled her. She was unaware of anything funny. But was he asking her to lie? People couldn't really go about things like that, building relationships on little lies they told each other...right?

Todd continued. "It ain't like hot girls just fall out of trees on me everyday. I'm not that stupid. You gotta be scheming something."

X23 could understand paranoia. Apparently, she did go about this the wrong way. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do this the wrong way. This is the first time I'm approaching a cool boy like this."

"Cool boy?", Todd arched an eyebrow.

"Well, you called me a hot girl.", she replied. "And my body temperature is barely above normal, just the added metabolism of having powers. Your body temperature is way colder than other peoples'."

The boy shrugged. "It's just another thing my power set does to me."

Todd penny dropped from the tree. With a single bound he was crouched in front of her. "But you got powers too? You're a mutant like me?"

"Not like you.", X23 told him. "But a mutant. Or at least that's what the professor told us we are. Mr. Lensherr says we're homo superior. They argue a lot about words."

"What can you do?", he asked.

**Information pump attempt! Distract. Terminate.**

X23 shook herself physically. Todd could see her flinch and then close her eyes in concentration. After a moment she looked at him and witness him gazing at her questioningly. She blushed. "Sorry. Bad thoughts."

"um..." X23 looked on the ground and found a sharpish rock. She then cut the back of her hand with it just to show Todd it healing.

"Cool, yo." He only knew of one other mutant with an outright accelerated healing factor.

"I'm cool now?", X23 countered. "I thought I was hot."

"Oh, nothing can keep you from being hot.", Todd hastily agreed.

"You can do more than just jump, though."X23 suggested shyly. "We could get to know each other if you show me yours and I show you mine?"

Todd grinned stupidly. "I like the sound of that."

And then a particularly juicy ant flew buy. He hadn't even realized his gaze had spotted it. Then he watch his tongue unfurl. Oh, no. And just when he was actually making conversation he was going to ruin everything by swallowing the bug. Dang it.

X23 just nodded. Then she pointed off in the distance. "You see that heron. It's got an injured leg."

Had she just ignored what he had done? Todd turned in the direction she pointed. His jaundiced eyes searched and searched and spotted nothing. He would understand if she just did the 'Hey Look' and split routine on him.

Todd turned back to the girl. "No, look.", she instructed. She took a knee next to him. Taking hold of his head, she guided his gaze. "It's white and grey."

Todd's eyes bounced all over as he only thought about the girl holding his chin. Then he saw...well, it could be a bird? Then the spot of white and grey wobbled, as if it couldn't walk right.

"You can see that well?", Toad asked.

"All my senses work that well. Sight, hearing...touch."

And with that she fell on his back again.

"Whoa whoa whoa...", Todd chanted as he wiggled out of her grasp.

"What?", X23 asked confused. "Everyone says you'd be thankful for a females attention. Don't let my muscle tone or the weight the adimantinum bonded to my bones adds: I am female."

Todd's eyes bugged. No one has ever accused Todd of being a genius. But healing factor + heightened senses + adimantinum bones = time to go. Multiply that by it wants to wrap its arms around your neck. That's just plain not being stupid.

"um...What's that?", Todd asked her.

**Turn! Counter.**

X23 was already driving her claws through the air behind her. She hadn't heard anything bigger than the owl asleep in a tree twenty or so yards away. But with the abilities she had witnessed in the mansion and the military technology she had been...exposed, how far fetched was silent striding or a foe floating by dragging the air away from her so she couldn't smell one approach.

What she hadn't guessed was Todd treating her like a weapon. She understood why everyone else treated her that way. It was not what they called her poor attitude. Or how much of an investment was put into making her one. It was the smell. They smelled like food to her. What possible opinion could they hold of her? Imagine the resentment one of them they would have if they had to treat every savory steak as another person. Look at how other mutants and humans treated each other. She struggled everyday not to tear into them like Kurt and breakfast. Of course it was going to pour over. No matter how much she chose to respect them and their right to life, it's not like she was going to somehow stop being herself.

But Todd smelled so different. He wasn't food. His scent carried a certain strength, like venom and poison. Nothing about him was something that taunted the animal in her, her other power and another she shared with her 'father, super rage. He would be the one. The one that held her humanity. That could hold her without turning her into what her childhood tried to force her to be. She could have tenderness, comfort, even cuddling.

But not if he ran away because she did not know what to do.

Who would know?

He would.

And he was leaping away, splashing down the creek at top speed. Hoping the water would throw her off his scent. Fortunately, he had not outpaced her hearing.

X23 had many abilities. More than most. However, her time at the mansion had taught her a grand truth that evaded many mutants a lot older than her. Mutants were not built by their powers. They were worth how much they drove their powers. A threat as grand as the Juggernaut was singular, smashing things until he was brought down. Mr. Lensherr was so much more dangerous because he studied his abilities for nearly half a century: he didn't just throw metal at people, he bent the light around him into television transmissions and dragged the errant electrons in television cords to induce enough of a current to convey his threats of throwing metal at people. Her own abilities were harder to apply outside their first applications, like being able to survive adimantinum bonding. However, another was the combination of that very metal and her healing factor.

When a normal person lifts weights, they tear muscle fibers. The resulting micro tears let blood flow in and clot. The muscle grows new fibers through these clots and leaves the muscle larger and therefore the person stronger. With her accelerated healing, this process happened nearly instantly. When she was dragged through exercises by her captors, she never 'felt the burn'. Now that she had a metal coated skeleton, she was in her own personal gym every single second of her life and never a need for down time.

So she took off after Todd. She could hyper ventilate and allow her healing factor to keep her from over bonding her hemoglobin. She could pound her legs into the ground with all her might and regrow her cartilage with every step. She could retract her claws and not leave a mark. And she could drive every stride with the muscles of everyone that ever ran track.

It did not mean she was guaranteed to actually catch up to a mutant who had a power specifically to jump away from her.

She saw him bouncing ahead. Sure she might rip her vocal cords trying to yell at a full sprint. But her voice had not served her all that well so far.

"I'm sorry!", she screamed.

Todd splashed down. He stayed a moment. Then he leaped again.

"No!", she continued. "Don't leave me alone."

It was her tone. There is a kind of life that drives that tone in people. They only can say that sentence in that tone if they've lived a life where that sentence does not carry the 'don't' all that much of the time.

He turned to her. They were both soaking wet. The water did nothing to the leather pants, combat boots and hide jacket she wore. It just set a drenching of her hair and a sheen on her skin. Todd felt as soggy as he wanted to feel all the time but his 'team' would never let him.

Todd stepped with all four limbs to face her. "Do you mean it?"

X23 nodded while pointing to her throat. After a moment she could say something other than a hoarse roar. "Yes. I did not want you to be scared of me. But you were going to leave if I didn't let you. I...What am I supposed to do?"

"I thought your friends told you already.", he countered.

"They told me how to approach a boy.", she replied. "I should have asked how to approach you. But I'm not gonna ask them. I'll ask you.

"What should I do?"

"Meet me someplace public. With lots of light, in the middle of the day with a gang of escape routes. Maybe some police patrols, yo.", Todd offered.

"Alright.", she agreed. "It's a date."

Todd blinked. "A what now."

X23 blinked in nearly the same manner. "A date.", she said again with dawning realization.

"Saturday, ok?", she confirmed.

Todd nodded spacily.

"um, great.", X23 told him. "Look. I, uh, ditched out on one of Mr. McCoy's classes to come see you. I mean it was a useless one, first aid...wound treatment and care. But I have a healing factor, so why do I need to know that, you know?

"I'll...see you later."

And with that she turned and started sprinting the other way down the creek.

2

Professor Xavier pressed his fingers together as he considered another of his less adjusted students. Across the desk, X23 sprawled out her muddy form across one of the leather arm chairs. He raised an eyebrow. She gave him a questioning expression and then realized. She sat so both of her feet were on the floor.

"Dr. McCoy informs me that you were not present for his training.", he opened.

X23 nodded. "That's right. I was promised freedom if I stayed here. Didn't see the point in it, so I ditched."

"And what will happen if you need to help some one who is injured on a mission?", the man asked.

Her eyes lit up with understanding. "First aid is for healing other people!"

Then her expression dropped. "And I could heal people instead of kill them if I learned it. And you were going to teach it to me. Oh, Professor, I'm sorry.

"Will Mr. McCoy still teach me?"

Professor Xavier smiled. "He wanted to have you read this book, as punishment for skipping his class. I asked him to let me offer this to you in a different way. I'm think you've found mine more to your liking."

"Well of course I would.", the girl stated while thumbing through the book. "You're a telepath."

He was taken aback. "I would never/"

X23 dismissed his objection with a wave of her hand and started sauntering out of the room. "You can't help hear thoughts. No more than I can help smell your old man scent."

"My what?", he asked a door swinging shut.


	3. Chapter 3

1

"Kurt, wait up.", Rogue called down the busy school hall.

The image turned to cover Kurt as he met her. "Oh. Hi, Rogue."

Rogue walked up and matched his slow pace. "I need to ask some brotherly advice."

Wagner frowned. "I...This is new to me."

"It's new to me too.", she countered. "On the other hand, what's the use of calling ourselves...you know. Because of Mystique. If we never/"

"No, I get it.", the boy nodded. "It's alright. Ask away."

"Ask Blue what?", Tabitha interjected as she sauntered down the hall from the other direction.

The image's smile lit up. "Just some sibling advice. I'll catch up with you later."

"Later better be sooner rather than later.", the blonde objected. "'Cause I'm feeling naughty. And if I do something naughty you're gonna hafta punish me. And you wouldn't want to do that, would you Blue?"

Rogue furrowed her brows as Tabitha sashayed off.

"Now as I was sayin'/"

"Hey, Fuzzy Elf!", Kitty exclaimed as she hugged him out of seemingly no where. "How's your day been?"

"It's going vell, fraulien.", he responded.

Rogue huffed. "Can you excuse me a moment, Kitty? Rogue and I were about to have a sibling moment."

"Like, say no more.", Pryde told him. "This cat doesn't have to mark her territory because of a sister."

The teen bounced down the hall, wagging her ponytail in time with her own beat.

"Like I was/"

Amanda pealed herself from the sea of students in the hall. Her lips wrapped around the image's ear while her teeth caught a much more pointed one. "You comin' over to help me, heh, heh, study Swashbuckler?"

Rogue frowned. "Swashbuckler?"

The image had the good grace to display a chastised expression. Kurt gently guided Amanda off of him. "I'll make vhat time I can, 'manda. I promise."

Amanda let go of his ear and patted his butt. "You better."

Rogue crossed her arms over her notebook and text. She then raised her eyebrow.

"That's the last of them.", Kurt assured her. "I think.

"What did you want?"

"I want know how to do that.", Rogue stated.

Kurt nodded.

"To Toad."

The image inducer couldn't contain the glow of his eyes for a fraction of a second.

2

Lance, as usual, was pushing the tip of his finger into the lunch room table attempting to make some much felt little thought point. Pietro, as usual, was draped over Wanda's shoulder who, as usual, was playing with his snow white hair. Fred, as usual, tried to eat everyone else' meals now that they were distracted.

Todd blinked at what the girl had told him.

That was not usual at all.

Toad glanced left and right really quickly. Ignoring the faces that the Brotherhood made at him, he saw that the flatscan...er, normie...er, human...not-X-gene-positive were ignoring him. He tried to clean out an ear with the finger of one hand while reaching for a napkin with another. He quickly wiped the finger on the napkin dissolving it. He then spit an antisceptic on his hands and rubbed them clean.

"What now?", Toad replied.

Rogue took in the spectacle she had been witnessed to and decided to forge ahead anyway.

"Would you like to go to the mall with me on Saturday?", Rogue repeated.

Todd turned back to his team. Blank stares and the occasional blink met him.

"What's in it for me?", he demanded.

Pietro's hand didn't seem to leave Wanda despite slapping the back of his head.

"I mean, really?", Todd adapted.

"I can do this all day, Toad.", Pietro warned.

"I mean, sure, I'd love to, walk you from the mansion?", Todd offered.

Lance finally found the where with all to speak. "You serious about this Rogue?"

Rogue set her shoulders and nodded firmly.

Lance sat back in his chair and slumped his shoulders in defeat. "Then he won't walk, he'll drive."

Rogue nodded again. Then she made her way back to X-Men clique space.

Toad contemplated this turn of events. It was as if he was forgetting something but could not figure out what.

The others leaned in conspiratorially. "Now that we have an in, we need to...


	4. Chapter 4

1

X-23 muttered as she stormed down the hall. Only Kitty was so very empathetic to actually risk taking the brunt of her annoyed ire. It probably helped that she was uniquely able to phase through adimantinum claws; a mixture of CQC, Krav Maga and Combat Sambo Spetznaz; and a surprising array of enemy personnel devices that the darker skinned girl managed to cobble together out of whatever was left laying around unguarded during any free time she was allotted.

"What's the matter?", Kitty asked her. "And don't say 'nothing'. We help each other around here."

"No you don't.", X-23 snapped. "Sorry. Not all of you."

"Well, like, I'll try if you want.", she offered.

X-23 crossed her arms and scowled. "And I you won't judge me over what you've said is my own business."

"Scouts honor.", Kitty beamed.

Then frowned. "Wait. What do you mean, 'your business'? I don't you should be harming anyone or that I should be helping you with that. There's better ways/"

The other girl scoffed and dismayed with a wave of her hand. "Don't worry. I don't have an intention of hurting him."

Then she frowned. "At least I don't think so."

"Him?", Kitty prompted.

X-23 shuffled. "Fine. I have a date on Saturday. And/"

"That's great!", Kitty beamed. "We have to get your look ready."

X-23 visibly relaxed. "Thank you! I've heard a girl is supposed to go over her appearance before a date but I couldn't get anyone to help me."

"I don't believe that.", Kitty declared. And then at the other girl's expression of exasperation. "Like, did you ask Jean? She's usually an expert at this sort of thing from hanging out with Duncan and the cheerleaders."

"I started with Jean!", X-23 exclaimed. "But it's always 'ew' and then followed by her faking the Professor's 'let me think in your head with a hand on your shoulder'-not-advice voice trying to talk me out of it."

"But didn't Jean want you to socialize more the most?", Kitty objected.

"Right? You see my frustration.", X-23 agreed. "And she shouldn't be one to be objecting to how someone looks."

"What?", Kitty asked. "Well, she is very pretty. Maybe she was thinking/"

"No she wasn't.", X-23 interrupted. "The girl nearly ovulates whenever Cyclops is in the room. And he will never have an objective opinion of what she looks like because of his eyes. The best she can do is implant a thought of herself in his head and that's going be uglier than she actually is because every espionage agency knows women judge their own appearance much harsher than those around them."

Kitty stayed silent a moment. "I see your point. Does your date look...have an appearance she wouldn't appreciate?"

"Oh, yes.", X-23 assured. "He doesn't look healthy at all. He isn't bulky like an alpha male or have concise features like the manipulative at all."

Kitty stayed silent.

"But there's other things too. His smell doesn't make me want to kill him like yours does."

"My what?", Kitty asked.

X-23 skipped over it. "And he is physically fit, or at least to any standard I'd need out of him. And his respiratory system has a soothing rhythm rather than the cacophony yours is doing right now."

"My what?", Kitty asked, anew.

The other girl placed her hand on the bottom of her sternum. "Bub-bub-bump-bump-bub-bump. It's like you're annoyed at something."

"I'm not annoyed.", and annoyed Kitty Pryde denied.

"His just acclimates to his surroundings nearly automatically.", X-23 explained.

Kitty nodded as she thought she had found something she could actually understand. "He's a real, cool guy, huh?"

The other girl snapped her fingers. "Exactly. You get it."

"Alright, that gives us something to work with.", Kitty stated. "But you said he looks kind of sickly. If he's self conscious about his looks, you're going to have to take that into account. Not everyone accepts on the first time that a girl can appreciate a face full of fur...er...beard. Beard. Put still, how pasty white is he?"

"He's not white.", X-23 said.

"Ohmigosh, I'm sorry.", Kitty apologized hastily. "I mean, I'm not like, sorry he's not white. I mean, good for you. Not that it matters. I mean, it...er...can? Maybe?"

"He's yellow.", the black haired girl informed.

This brought Kitty to a complete standstill. On one hand she knew two pertinent pieces of information: X-23 was basically a clone of Mr. Logan with a copy of his X chromosone swapped with his Y to get the process to work, and that every time she overheard one of the teachers talk about Mr. Logan's past loves it was usually some Asian name- Itsu, Atsuko, Mariko, Yukio or Yuriko or something, etc. Which gave Jubilee some ideas that Kitty thought would be pretty creepy in reverse. In other other hand, Kitty also thought that it probably wasn't a good way to try to charm an Asian by calling him yellow.

"You know, like jaundice of the liver?", X-23 prompted.

Oh! "Oh!", Kitty exhaled a breath she didn't know she was holding.

"Alright. Given that: You know how you have this whole intimidating vibe and this guy doesn't set that off for you. Maybe you should go with that. Not wear your usual leather and military gear style. Something softer. That'll show him that you dressed up for the date without, like, letting him know you dressed up for the date."

X-23 furrowed her brow. "Why would I want to keep dressing up for a date secret, if the goal is to spend enough effort to get him into a relationship? How would he know I spent the effort if I don't hide it from him?"

"Oh, girl, you have so much to learn."

2

Kitty relaxed on her bed. She had a fun time helping X-23 get a plan for Saturday. A lot of people said the girl was like a drill sargeant before a war. But X-23 listened carefully to her advice. She was methodical and took into account the potential effectiveness of any outfit. And filled with great advice like "No plan survives contact with a date." X-23 was really breaking away from her super-weapon conditioning.

What broke up the peace was Rogue, even more surly than usual. "What's with you?", Kitty inquired.

"Oh, ya wanna get me stahted huh?", Rogue declared. "This first time, THE FIRST TIME, I ask for any help about a date that I have...After having to listen to all of you go in circles and holding patterns that you can just keep to until you feel like cowboy'n up. After all I've had to deal with from all of you. I ask for help, this one time! And it's all 'Are you sure, Rogue?' 'Is it the careful thing, Rogue?' 'You know the example and X-man should set, right, Rogue?'"

Rogue flopped on her bed in their shared room. "Like I don't know how serious my mutation is. I'm the frickin' expert in mutations, as many of you people's ah got rattlin' around in mah head. And Jean wants to think I haven't thought about it. She can read my mind and still think I'm not worried sick about whether or not ah'm doing the right thing!"

Kitty rolled over and looked at her. "You know what'll cheer you up. Picking out your outfit."


	5. Chapter 5

1

X-23 stood at the main entrance to the professor's ancestral home. She hugged herself, uncomfortable in the sheer and translucent cloth top. Not because it was not opaque enough for modesty's sake: it was. But because of how easily it could be cut through. The same for her cloth leggings leading to a short skirt and belt combo that said "punk rock" louder than the worried frown on her face could.

Rogue stood at the main entrance to the professor's ancestral home. She hugged herself, uncomfortable in the heavier leather bomber jacket: a replica of the brown with X insignia one Scott had taken to wearing all the time. Thick, cut resistant pants and gloves with combat boots allowed her to keep her dangerous skin covered without using her regular wardrobe to be as darkly intimidating as it typically was.

Jean stood inside the mansion's entry hall shaking her head.

"What's bothering you?", Kitty asked between bites of an apple.

Jean was about to answered but then caught the thought that Kitty was the one person she wouldn't have to explain this situation to. Or at least shouldn't. Maybe she should start just reading people's minds casually instead of getting the wires crossed with stray images.

Kitty looked back at the two girls. "Yeah, so?

"Sure it's their first date. Maybe they can support each other."

"You know about this?", Jean asked incredulously.

"Sure I do.", the brunette assured. "I helped pick out their clothes."

"What made you think that it was a good idea to support them both going out with Toad simultaneously while dressed like each other?"

Kitty's apple hit the ground with a thud as her eyes blinked and watered. "What what what with who and how now?"

2

Todd tried to smooth his hair with a comb. It didn't work. He held out a palm to spit in.

"I will beat your amphibian ass.", Wanda informed him.

The boy waggled his eyebrows in the mirror. "And here I was saving up to pay you for it, be-utiful."

Pietro materialized next to him. "What'stakingsolong?Getmoving!"

"Okay, okay.", the slower boy replied. He looked back at his reflection.

"Do you think X-23'll like this shirt?"

The Maximoff siblings looked at each other. "Who?"

"The girl I'm going out on a date with.", Todd said slowly.

The two shook their heads in unison. "Rogue's the one girl that managed to stomach asking you out.", Wanda told him.

Todd froze. "Huh, I do remember that. Man, I am a stud, yo. At least that's on Saturday."

A breeze later and Pietro was holding a calendar in front of Todd. "That's why Lance is lending you his jeep, remember?", Wanda continued.

Todd looked Pietro right in the eye. Then (possibly for the first time), he looked Wanda in the eyes without so much as dipping beneath her neck. He then turned back to his own reflection.

His reflection shrugged back at him.

"I guess that's that.", Todd lamented. "Time to split."

In a single leap he was at the window. Pietro managed to grab the squirming Todd before he could leap away. "Lemme go! I don't wanna die! You can't make me!"

"The hell I can't.", Wanda replied. "You are our 'in'. And that means you will drive Lance' jeep past that mansion's security. You will take some of the X-geeks away from that said mansion. And you will do nothing that says anything other than that you are very thankful for the opportunity bestowed upon you."

"What opportunity is that?", a stock still Todd asked.

"Keeping my boot off your backside, Toad!", Wanda screeched.


	6. Chapter 6

Neko:In the previous chapter, both girls approached Jean for help with their date with Todd. I thought it would be implied that while they didn't get to tell Kitty who the boy was, they did both tell Jean.

1

By now, students at the Mansion had gotten themselves into spying positions. Whether it took ice-sliding to the roof, hanging from one's tail in a near enough tree or simultaneously standing in the good echo points on the grounds and trying to piece it all together by memory later everyone that attended Bayville High and the Charles Xavier School for Gifted Youngsters was prepared.

The adults were not.

Logan scratched his head, gnawed on his cigar and glared around as if he didn't trust what his senses are telling him. They told him that Todd, of all people, was here to take girls, plural, on a date.

"I mentioned that one shares my DNA and is as close to my daughter as there is in the world, right?", he asked.

The boy, holding two halves of a bouquet in either hand nodded. Logan's hand moved from the top of his head to his chin.

"You know what I can do to you, right?"

The boy shrugged and looked just as uncomfortable as Logan.

Rogue and X-23 were several yards away, further down the driveway. They were in each other's faces, certainly.

"What do you mean, 'I get it'?", Rogue fumed.

"I found Todd attractive and approached him.", X-23 explained again. "You saw someone previously available as unavailable and that made him more attractive from your perspective. It's the reason why male agents are paired with female agents when they're assigned to approach female targets. Didn't anyone here get espionage conditioning?"

"I didn't know you made a move on him!", Rogue pointed out.

X-23 frowned. "But aren't you a psionic, that can grab the memories and personalities of a person right out of them?"

"I never touched you.", she reminded the shorter girl.

"Hm. Did you talk to Jean? I asked her for help with my outfit and she's a farther reaching telepath.", X-23 surmised.

"I asked her for help with my clothes. For my date.", Rogue stated.

"Well, the other option is that Todd is confident enough to court multiple women at once." X-23 deduced. "Impressive."

As X-23 walked over to Todd, Rogue gaped. "No it isn't."

Logan continued to glare at Todd. "Are you still intimidating our date?", the girl asked.

Logan spied her out the corner of his eye as he continued to face Todd. "Shouldn't I be."

"How's your healing factor today?', she followed up.

"Pretty good I guess, if-ugh/", Logan was cut off as two adimantinum claws tore through a lung to puncture his heart and aorta.

"Stop scaring our date!", X-23 demanded. She turned to Todd, whose jaw had drop he showed nearly as much tongue as when in combat. "Flowers? Why...oh, I was told about this possibility. Are those for me?"

The boy nodded vigorously. He held out the right half, thought better of it and held out the left, but reconsidered. He ended up holding out both halves to ward off impending doom. X-23 took the bouquet on the right.

"Rogue, are you coming?"

Rogue was kneeling next to Mr. Logan, about to panic and apply what little first aid she could in about that order. Fortunately for her, Mr. Logan stood up on his own even if he had his arms wrapped around himself. What truly scared her was that he didn't even seem angry. Mr. Logan always seemed angry.

"This as important to you as it is to her?", he ground actually considered the question.

Todd's bathed appearance and having at least split up the bouquet he had purchased showed he had put some thought into this. It was still an incredibly hugely improbable chance that she might end up with anyone. But at least she had one. "I'm sorry.", Rogue whispered.

"Not yet you aren't.", Mr. Logan informed. "Tomorrow, when you're detailing the X-Jet. Then you'll be sorry. But in the meantime, beat it."

"Thank you.", Rogue then raced up to Todd and took the remaining flowers. She then hopped into Lance's showed all due diligence in evacuating the area.

2

Rogue and X-23 rode along in silence in the back of the jeep. Toad worried about the road, showing he had driven maybe twice outside of driver's ed. He would sometimes seem to brace himself and then look in the rearview mirror at the passengers. He'd then shake his head and jerk the jeep back into the center of the lane.

"Yeah, this akward.", Rogue commiserated.

X-23 gave her a glance before her eyes widened in realization. "Oh, the silence.

"Rogue's right. On a date, you're supposed to get to know someone. So Todd...Mr. Lensherr tells me you're a mutant supremist."

Todd did not have nor cause an accident. He was prepared to testify to that in court.

Rogue crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow at the rearview mirror.

"Uh...that's a heavy question, yo.", Todd began. "I mean, the answer to that depends on the definition of supremist and the mutant."

Rogue cut in. "Like what the definition of 'is' is, shug?"

"You were at the house once, you know.", Todd threw back. "You know it's not that simple.

"I don't think I'm the mindset that I'd be if I had the Maximoff twin's looks and Gambit's powers."

"Who?", X-23 asked.

"One of Magneto's stooges.", Rogue dismissed.

"But when you're me...", Todd trailed off.

"Let me guess.", Rogue asked. "Kicked out the house cause it weirded everyone out before you could get a good grasp on your powers. Raving psychopath offers you a place to belong coupled with a bit of self-esteem in the idea that you're better than the bullies."

Todd stopped the jeep. "We are better than the bullies."

He got out and opened the door for X-23. "They don't give Nobel prizes to morons. They don't give fortunes to the lazy. They don't give championship rings to injured guys."

The boy hopped over the car to open the door for Rogue. "Sure, you have to earn what you get. But Homo Superiors can earn it in ways that nobody could before, yo."

The two girls drew closer so that he could talk to both at the same time. "Look, it's like this. I got a few points on this and I know X's men (and ladies) don't like it but it's what I think, okay?"

The girls looked at each other, then nodded to Todd.

"Alright.", Todd drew in a breath and let out a tone that X-23 could have sworn was a croaking if it had been in the normal hearing range.

"First, what's the damn difference, really? No one was as smart as Leonardo Da Vinci or Issac Newton but they get respected for having been better than other people. Why is it the head of Stark Industries or Shaw Corporation are applauded for making repulsor weapons and Sentinels of all things, and not your boy Forge just because his talent comes from a different gene than theirs? Why did your brother get cheers flipping through a circus and assaulted when the costume couldn't come off? That's bullshit.

"And cowardice. I mean, the normies (that's what we call flatscans)/"

"'Flatscan' is a slur too.", Rogue informed him.

"Jesus, what do you call 'em?", Todd asked.

Rogue shrugged. "People."

"Oh, like we ain't?", Todd countered.

X-23 chuckled.

Rogue glared at her. "Fine."

Todd had the good grace to look sheepish. "Well, thanks. Anyway...the X-gene Negative are completely afraid of us. And for no good reason. Didn't Jean get kicked off the soccer team and have all her trophies taken away because she was X-gene positive. And you can't give me that 'powers allow her to cheat' because if she had, every single parent that taped a game would have noticed it. Usain Bolt can win gold medals because he was born fast and Pietro can't? That's the being scared part. Then it's the no cause for it! When was the last time a mutant high school kid came in and used his powers instead of an assault rifle to make a name for himself? Hell, my house is packed with supremists and none of us burned a cross on nobody's lawn.

"Mystique told us that Magneto had a saying, yo. 'I'm glad they call me an evil mutant, because that means they're afraid. That means I'm doing my job.' But they call everybody an 'evil mutant', even Scott. 'Ugly mutant', even Storm. 'Gene-freak', because in the same way 'sand-nigger' says 'nigger' isn't enough, 'freak' isn't enough. The best they have is what, Amanda's fetish?"

"Kurt's not a fetish!", Rogue defended.

"Of course 'crawler isn't a fetish, that's my point. But to Amanda he is. The only person who wanted to use Jean's powers to cheat at anything were Duncan and his gang. You really think Pietro couldn't finish college by the end of the year at an hour a day? That Lance couldn't mine himself rich instead of bustin' ass down at the junkyard? But because we're out numbered a hundred thousand to one, they want to limit the competition to things they can win: like the fat kid that always wants to wrestle but never runs." Todd finished.

"So excuse me if I'd rather think of myself as Homo Superior, yo. Especially when the alternatives are looking a jaundice scrawny dude every morning and being pushed around just as much as I was when I was still 'normal' in Brooklyn."

"I'm sorry that you've been led to feel that way, Todd.", Rogue responded. "The X-Men are working toward a day when you don't have to."

"Well, you let me know when that day comes. Until then, maybe it's some fake self-esteem but it's mine.", Todd said softly, if a bit bitterly.

Rogue took his left hand in her gloved right. "You don't need fake self-esteem. How many other guys can take two girls out on a first date."

X-23 took his right hand in her left. "Besides, it's a lot more thought a position than the Professor told us it was."

"Well, you'd better enjoy it when you can get it.", Todd warned. "Thinkin' ain't my strong suit, yo."

X-23 nodded. "Hopefully, loving is."

Rogue gaped at her.

"What, you were thinking it too."

"I was not."

"You're psionic!"


End file.
